Inhuman

[starkingenuity]

One day Tony Stark would realize that playing with Chitauri technology, even just ‘for fun,’ was a bad idea. He never bothered relying on his own safety protocols. He never bothered with putting precautions in place to make sure that he didn’t blow himself up. And when he did blow himself up, he didn’t stop to examine the underlying causes as to why that was.

Banner was gone off to parts unknown (Tony respected his obvious wishes and didn’t track down his easily track-downable quinet). Tony himself had left the Avengers. There was younger blood that could take the stress. He was prepared to settle down with Pepper, maybe get this whole marriage thing he was evidently supposed to be getting around to started, and…well…tinker with all of the fun things he had collected from HYDRA.

Seriously. They had a Leviathon! Tony wanted to Magic School Bus it up and have the coolest private airplane ever. Was that so wrong? The answer was very likely ‘yes.’

Pepper was away in England doing something or other (Tony trusted her with his company and he had no desire to ever be involved with it again, thank you) and so when Steve Rogers called about a faulty electromagnet on his shield-catching wrist, Tony paused the reverse engineering he was doing in his Lab in Manhattan and told the blond to come on up. “But only if you bring pizza. I haven’t eaten in weeks,” he lamented.

FRIDAY was quick to correct him. “It’s been thirteen hours, Boss!” she said cheerfully.

“Thirteen hours! I’m wasting away to practically nothing, Rogers! Hurry!”

Comments

[starspangledspandex]

Steve was busy trying to stem his nosebleed and as such, had his eyes closed to concentrate on putting pressure on it. So he when he was confused enough by what Tony meant to open his eyes, he was too late to stop the punch.

Ow.

"What was that for?!" he demanded, shifting his hand to press against the new soreness on his face. This was just what he needed in addition to the bloody nose. "Are you nuts?"

[starkingenuity]

"Yeah. Obviously," Tony winced and felt his teeth with his tongue. He was fine but they still ached. Great. Just great. How the hell did their brainwaves link up to their nervous systems like that? It really shouldnt be possible and yet he had just proved it.

Tony pulled up a stool and sat himself down upon it, knees up and hand running through his hair. He grabbed a small electrical prod from his desk, the same sort used to test the viability of electrical components, and gave himself a sap on the knee.

It didn't hurt but it wasn't pleasant either.

"Get it yet?"

[starspangledspandex]

Tony's sarcasm was not appreciated. He just assaulted Steve! His teammate and somewhat friend. People just didn't do that to one another without a reason and so far, his reasoning didn't seem to be entirely sound. It would have been easier and faster if the man just explained his hypothesis instead of punching him. There were easier ways to test this.

Like the electrical prod.

Steve jerked slightly, glancing down at his knee and then back up to Tony. He definitely felt that and it was weird. It almost seemed like he was feeling what Tony felt and that shouldn't be possible.

"That doesn't make any sense."

[starkingenuity]

"It does too," Tony complained. "Your jaw is annoyingly perfect. Everyone wants an excuse to hit you-- Oh. You mean the sympathetic nervous system? Yeah. Well. We got zapped by alien technology even I don't completely understand. I wasn't trying to fix a tractor here Cap."

He still rubbed his jaw, though the pain was fading. That would be the healing factor. The super soldier was such a cheater.

"I hope it rights itself because... Yeah. You take hits for a living. You'll send me right into shock."

[starspangledspandex]

"You were working with alien technology and you didn't take any precautions?" Steve frowned, because this was obviously Tony's fault. He couldn't just go working on figuring out the Chitauri without some focus on safety. He should have some kind of suit on. He shouldn't be dancing in the middle of a field of energy.

"Is there a way we can speed that process up? I'm not thrilled with the idea either."

[starkingenuity]

"Jesus you don't expect to be Vulcan mind melded with this stuff! Maybe some electrical fires or explosions but how do you protect against this?!" Tony was not taking the blame. "You startled me. You turned off the music and lost the beat. And the. You touched me!"

So it was Steve's fault. It wasn't Tony's. It was never actually Tony's fault for anything. And to prove it, he pinched himself to show Steve his displeasure.

[starspangledspandex]

"I don't know," Steve said stubbornly. "But I'm sure you could have done something. I wouldn't have interrupted if I knew you were busy studying something so dangerous. I could have warned you that I was here."

It was, in fact, Tony's fault. He was the scientist here. He was the one that needed to make sure it was safe. "You could have locked the door and waited until I was here to clean up. There were options."

Of course, it didn't matter now because it was done. He could pinch himself all he wanted but that didn't really phase Steve.

[starkingenuity]

"I am ALWAYS doing something dangerous!" Tony yelled back, but his head was aching and screaming was getting him no where. "So just shut-- Shut up. I need to run some tests. It's really childish to point fingers, Cap, by the way. What are you, twelve?" Tony scoffed and sat down at his desk, but concentrating was impossible.

The smell of the pizza...

"Do you always smell things so...strongly?" His mouth was watering. He was hungry, sure, but that pizza smelled like the best pizza in his entire life. "Does everything taste better too?"

[starspangledspandex]

"It's called responsibility, Tony," Steve said seriously. He was pointing fingers but only because the man needed the scolding. There were precautions he should take to dealing with anything dangerous but it was even more imperative when he was working with something that was completely unknown. He should be working in an isolation chamber.

He watched Tony sit down to work and scowled. The non-sequitor wasn't really distracting him either. "All of my senses were enhanced by the serum. I don't really have anything to compare it to now. My senses were pretty dull before it."

Tony should know how dull everything was when he was sick. Steve assumed he was sick himself at some point.

[starkingenuity]

Tony just sort of gazed at that box of people for awhile before he finally got up to have a slice. If it smelled amazing, it tasted-- "Oh goooood," he groaned, absolutely overcome by the pizza melting on his tongue. It was nothing short of dirty. "It's like an orgasm in my mouth-- You wouldn't know what that is but it's amazing! This happens for you all the time?"

He shouldn't be enjoying this but it was wonderful. He could fix them soon. Right after he had another slice.

[starspangledspandex]

He raised an eyebrow--who said he didn't know what that was? Tony clearly didn't know anything about him. ...not that they often talked about their sex lives when they were on missions. Steve decided it was better not to hurt Tony's brain and to let him keep thinking it.

"I'm used to it," he shrugged. "So it all tastes pretty normal. I guess when I eat something I don't like it's worse. It's harder to hide spices I don't care for when I taste like that."

[starkingenuity]

"Like what? Can't chop up vegetables in the sauce because you'll find them?" Tony turned, half shutting the lid to the pizza to keep it warm. He had no idea how Steve managed to regulate when all of this stuff was so blissfully wonderful. Maybe he felt the same way doing back flips and punching Hitler though?

Tony licked his fingers clean, trying to peer through Steve's facade. All of his senses were on fire. Everything connected with Steve just felt more alive.

And tony was nothing if not an adrenaline junkie.

[starspangledspandex]

"Not a cilantro fan," Steve tells him, shrugging one shoulder slightly. "And I've never been good with spicy food." He's sure that's because he hadn't cared for it before the war and it's something he's never grown out of now that he's older.

He's just used to it now. Steve does still smash into things on accident. Huge holes in the wall and all. It's not really his fault but he has those moments where he's still that skinny kid from Brooklyn.

"I'm glad you're enjoying yourself," he adds, and even though it's pretty light, he's obviously grumbling a little bit.